7.08.2005

Look away, look away, look away, Dixieland

I have a sort of love/hate relationship with the South. Sometimes I feel like a battered spouse in a Lifetime Original movie: I want to stay away, I know I should stay away, but he's so beautiful and charming. Maybe I'll just give him one more chance. Things will be better this time, I just know it!

I lived in South Carolina for about 14 years. It's a really wonderful place in a lot of ways, and there are a lot more well-educated, reasonable people there than the stereotypes would have you believe.

But then there's ridiculous shit like this this that makes me think it's time to check into a shelter and start filing the divorce paperwork.

Please, South Carolina, I'm pleading with you: don't let the crazies come in. You've worked so hard to change your image since that whole being-the-first-to-secede-from-the-Union thing. Do you really want to go through that again? I know it all seems innocent at first: just a little prayer in school, maybe a Ten Commandments monument in front of the court house. But before you know it these people will be banning alcohol and hanging the gays from flag poles by their underpants and waving their guns around while yelling about States' Rights. Do we really want to go through all that again?

3 comments:

TMC said...

After the first few Fridays of this blog, I assume that Barrelhouse has lost any Christian readers it may have once had.

Also, since when is evolution a "discredited theory?"

Lesley said...

These idiots don’t even practice what they preach. They’re a bunch of hypocrites living in Texas. Hopefully that’s because South Carolina has banned them from entering the state.

Mike said...

Tom, obviously you need to put down the liberal propagandaist "science textbooks" and pick up Jesus' science book, a little thing we call The Bible.