The Golden Barrelys

Last night was the Golden Globes. Apparently. As usual, I haven't seen enough good movies to weigh in on what should and shouldn't have won there, but I sure have seen a lot of TV.

Below are my takes on who should have won what, plus some special awards, along with some categories (The Golden Barrelys, named after our fictional mascot, Barrely Barrelhouse) that should have been included.

Series, Drama:

• Won: Lost
  
• Should Have Won: Rome
  
• Strangely Not In Consideration, Maybe Because of Some Rule Thing I'm Not Understanding: Six Feet Under
  
• The Buffy Award for the Best Show That Will Likely Never Get An Award for Anything Ever: Rescue Me
  
• Most Likely to Be Better Than All These Shows Next Season: The Wire, The Sopranos

Series, Musical or Comedy:

• Won: Desperate Housewives
  
• Should Have Won: Arrested Development
  
• Maybe Even Better Than Arrested Development But Since It's a Cartoon, Well, You Know: South Park
  
• Also Better Than Desperate Housewives: Weeds, The Office, Entourage, Curb Your Enthusiasm, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
  
• Where Oh Where Have You Gone: Chappelle's Show
  
• Please Stop Nominating Before You Embarrass Yourselves: Desperate Housewives
  
• Not to Get Ahead of Ourselves or Anything, but Does This Maybe Mean We're Finally Done With: Fat Men with Hot Wife Sitcoms, Will and Grace

Actress, Drama:

• Won: Geena Davis, Commander in Chief
  
• Should Have Won: Polly Walker, Rome; Kristin Bell, Veronica Mars
  
• Buffy Award for Cute Blond Acress in a Kickass Series Who Will Never Be Recognized Because She is Too Cute and Blond: Kristin Bell, Veronica Mars

Actor, Drama:

• Won: Hugh Laurie, House
  
• Should Have Won: Peter Krause or Michael C. Hall, Six Feet Under (I dont know, maybe Six Feet Under wasn't eligible or something, or maybe both of these guys would be considered supporting. I know what they did in this past season of Six Feet was way better than limp around and yell at everybody).
  
• Should Have Won If We're Assuming The Dudes from Six Feet Under Can't Win, and Also Only because the Sopranos and The Wire weren't on): Denis Leary, Rescue Me

Actor, Series, Musical or Comedy:

• Won: Steve Carell, "The Office"
  
• Should Have Won: Steve Carell

Actress, Series, Musical or Comedy:

• Won: Mary-Louise Parker, Weeds
  
• Should Have Won: Mary-Louise Parker
  
• Strangely Not Nominated: Lauren Graham, Gilmore Girls
  
• Time is Running Out Fast For: Teri Hatcher, Desperate Housewives

THE GOLDEN BARRELYS:

Best Unintentional Comedy, Reality Edition:

• Taradise
  
• Honorable Mention: Tom Cruise, Oprah Winfrey Show, George Bush, "You're doin' a heckuva job, Brownie," sound bite

Best Unintentional Comedy Moments, Drama:

• "Public Shool" on The OC
  
• Honorable Mention: "Writing Workshop" on The L Word

Best Unintentionally Hilarious Host of a Reality TV Show:

• Tara Reid, Taradise
  
• Honorable Mention: Donald Trump, The Apprentice, Tyra Banks, America's Top Model

Best Intentionally (I Think) Hilarious Actor in a Reality TV Program:

• Flava Flav

Best Unintentionally Hilarious Actor in a Reality TV Program:

• Jonathan Antin, Blow Out
  
• Honorable Mention: Bobby Brown, Being Bobby Brown

Best Unintentionally Hilarious Evil Supporting Actor in a Reality TV Program:

• Scott from Zorbit, Blow Out

Best Actress in a Reality TV Program:

• Whitney Houston, Being Bobby Brown
  
• Honorable Mention: Adrienne Curry, My Fair Brady

I'm Still Not Getting Whether Its Real or Fake But I Don't Like It:

• Laguna Beach

Best Comedy, Musical, and/or Cartoon:

• South Park

Best Leading Actor in a Cartoon:

• Stewie Griffin, Family Guy

Best Supporting Actor in a Cartoon:

• Chef, South Park

Best Supporting Acress in a Comedy:

• Jaime Pressley, My Name is Earl

Best Supporting Actor (Who is Also a Former Hair Metal Singer) in a Comedy:

• Sebastian Bach, Skid Row, The Gilmore Girls

Biggest Jackass/Blowhard:

• Dr. Phil
  
• Honorable Mention: Bill O' Reilly

Best in Show:

• The Daily Show