2.06.2008

Is Nick Lachey Really That Bad?

Linked on Deadspin is a rant by a Boston blog who claimed that Nick Lachey's presence on the Fox pregame ruined the game for him. To be sure, I didn't watch Fox pregame and thus didn't see any Lachey. Instead, I hung out with friends and re-watched Elizabeth (the first/good one with Cate Blanchett) on HD TV and DVD. Amazing picture quality. And what better way to prepare yourself for the Byzantine world of spying and backstabbbing that represents the New England Patriots? Bill Belichick as Norfolk scheming to seize the throne from Eli Manning, a guileless queen infatuated with Joseph Fiennes. Or something like that. And playing Rock Band, which is totally awesome, even though I can only do the Bass on Easy.

Back to Nick Lachey. What's so bad about him? I put celebrities/stars/artists in 3 categories: I hate their work but think they would be fun to hang out with 2) I love their work but think they would be horrible to hang out with--Russell Crowe and probably David Simon, and just about every funny comedian come to mind--and 3) I hate their work and they would be horrible to hang out with--Ryan Seacrest, Carrot Top, Tom Cruise, and just about everyone else. And the odds of "I love their work and they would be fun to hang out with" probably begins and ends with the South Park guys, though they would probably put Ben Gay in your underwear before they accepted you. And I'm willing to consider George Clooney and Matt Damon. And by "fun to hang out with" I mean getting a beer like regular Joes. Sitting enthralled by them for hours while they tell you about all the amazing things they've done or seen or written doesn't count.

I think Nick Lachey falls into the "fun to hang out with category". His music is abosolutely horrible, but he's an Ohio boy from Cincinnati Moeller (an athletic powerhouse that produced Ken Griffey Jr. and dozens of football state championship teams). Of course he married Jessica, but its clear she is under the sway of her creepy father, and what red-blooded American wouldn't want to marry that circa 2003 or so? Until apparently the Fox pregame he's been pretty invisible in terms of grabbing attention in desperate ways.

In the ladies category, I would go with Carrie Underwood and Kelly Clarkson. They seem kinda unpretentious and possibly fun. Can't say I'm too crazy about their music, although I do like country and I haven't listened much to Underwood.

I'm guessing that this Boston guy is in denial over his Cheatriots, so I'll give him the benefit of the doubt. Meanwhile, if you have any suggestions for "celebrities whose work you hate but think they would be fun to hang out with", include in the comments.

5 comments:

Mike Ingram said...

Nick Lachey seems like an acceptable dude to have a few beers with. Though during the college season, I always figured every shot of Nick was one less shot of Erin Andrews.

Mike said...

I, for one, have never met a guy who would admit to wanting to hang out with Nick Lachey. He seems like a douchebag/airhead. He and Jessica were perfect for each other. Thanks for the link, though.

JP said...

Dude. Isn't Patrick Swayze, like, your magazine's mascot? And is he not the best example imaginable of someone's whose work is retarded but who you'd definitely want to chill with? Regularly?

As for me, I'd like to hang out with Rachael Ray (whose food kind of blows), but only if I got to beat her as we drank our beers. And maybe bang her, too. But all at once, you know, or it wouldn't be fun.

Also, anyone at all from "The White Rapper Show" would qualify for me.

But come to think of it, me and Jilly actually had one of these experiences in real life! We spent a ridiculous Sunday brunch at Cafe Le Figaro in the West Village with Lance Bass, who is clearly the epitome of musical suckage but, amazingly, was kind of hilarious to interact with and observe. And he wants to go into space (and actually was *this* close to actually getting to, unlike the rest of us) so isn't that sort of cool, maybe?

Anonymous said...

I don't know if Swayze in his prime would have been all the cool to hang out with. I think all that success went to his head...I mean did you see the drawing in our issue?

Anonymous said...

Issue 2, that is -- with a very special Swayze section...back issues on sale now! and on that cool poster we had at AWP that Dave made: Nobody puts Barrelhouse into a corner...and ironically, we were!