The "P" in UPS Stands for "Sucks"

We Barrelhousers do not disquest on matters economic, but I am lucky that UPS has such a crappy ad campaign that I can use that as an entree to my real complaint about that feces-colored company.

I remember watching that UPS commercial wherein some guy drew a plane and the U.S. and China and an arrow on a whiteboard, and thinking to myself, "There is nothing remotely ironic, retro, or humorous, or whatever about that ad. It's simple, but stupid simple."

Well, stupid simple they are. I had occasion to return an HDTV to UPS, and stayed home from work for the better part of an afternoon this Monday so that the UPS man would not pass me by on his third try (of course the first 2 took place while I was out of town at AWP).

Well, he did. But he reported stopping by at both 4:18pm and 10:18pm. Hmmmm.....So I complain, but UPS can't do anything about it until I get the online store, in this case the good people at TigerDirect.com, to issue another return order. So I get that done. The UPS people tell me I can specify where to pick it up since they understand I won't be home--like out back, in the garage, etc. So I do so specify--in the garage. (Also keep in mind that the next day I stayed home for the better part of the afternoon for a 3rd visit from DirecTV only to be told that the trees blocked a proper satellite signal.)

This morning I receive an automated message at work that UPS will come by to pick the TV up today. The TV is still in the living room. I drive back home and put up signs and wonders telling not just the UPS man, but everyone in the world, that the box is in the garage. I return to work. Not 10 minutes later the front desk calls me and tells me the UPS man is here to pick up the TV.

Jesus H.!! I never changed the address for pickup, yet magically they come to my work address! What is going on with this company? Who's ass have they crawled out from recently that makes them stink so bad? They are starting to look the inverse of that SNL delivery service that takes the blame for sending your package late.

All right. Rant over. Return to your normal lives.