If Rachael Ray Is Allowed to Make Her Special Sauce, the Terrorists Will Have Won

According to this article, Rachael Ray is supporting the terrorists because she is wearing what seems to be (but isn't) a keffiyeh.

Of course, Dunkin Donuts has long courted controversy by employing pitchmen--or is that pitchpeople--who have dreadful human rights records, like a clearly past his prime Adolf Hitler:

UPDATE: Didn't mean to step on Mike's toes, but you have to admit, my post is funnier.

UPDATE #2: Hey Aaron, get off my back! Yeah, that's right, this is Mike, and I AM IN YOUR POST! Mwahahahahaha! It's only a matter of time before I'm in your braaaaaaiiiin.

On a more serious note, Dunkin Donuts caved to pressure and pulled the ad. Though, in a final twist, it was pointed out this evening on NPR -- yeah, I listen to NPR, mofos, that doesn't mean I can't still start some shit -- that not only do terrorist-types wear the ol' keffiyah, EVERYONE who goes into the Middle Eastern desert wears them, as they're designed to keep sand out of your nose and mouth. Apparently the coalition forces -- including Americans, Brits and Aussies -- have been wearing them in Afghanistan since this whole War o' Terror began. Which means that Michelle Malkin and the rest of the d-bags who drummed up this fake controversy in fact hate the motherfuckin' troops. I always knew it. They said they liked the troops, loved them even, but I always knew they were liars. Dirty, rotten liars.

As for you, Pease, don't worry: you'll get yours.

Ingram out!


JP said...

Jesus WHY OH WHY don't I have admin privileges on this account!?!? I WANT TO BE IN THIS POST!

But since I don't:

Update #3: Reporting live from New York, every bitch in Soho is wearing one of these things. I can't walk a half block to the fucking McNally's bookstore without tassels flying into my eyes from all directions. If I wanted tassels hanging out from in and around my clothes, I'd get down with my chosen people and wear some Talis all Yentl-style.

(Though at least that would mean I support the troops, I guess. Which I DO.)

JP said...

Also, Aaron spelled Rachael Ray's name right and Mike didn't. Aaron either a) wins or, b) is gay.